Boxercise S&M

I'm still in shock! Have to blog this...

After 1.5 wks of resting after my dance performance, and seeing that the 'muffins' were starting to appear, I decided to go back to my 3 times a wk regime at my regular gym. This time, I went back with a vengeance. Actually some weeks ago, my company had a health screening and i was totally flabbergasted at my body fat content. And so, for now, it will be a mean combination of high impact cardio + resistance training.

Just to share a tip:
- Do weights before cardio. You don't want to go on an all-time peak low when you're working out your muscles.

So it's my first time at this boxercise class at my gym today (gym has various class schedules). I don't usually attend this one, but i thought i'll give it a try anyway. In walked the fitness trainer, who's about 1.8, decked in shiny red gear with a pair of white Adidas shorts worn over. All these were teamed up with white/blue shoes. Hmmm, "interesting fashion sense" i thought to myself. And what's even more interesting that this guy is probably one of the first of the fitness trainers who doesn't seem the least bit gay. "Promising" thought to myself again. In fact he looks like someone who's been with the military for a LONG while.

Unlike the rest of the cardio classes like body combat, cardio kick etc. that i have attended. This trainer has his fixed actions by numbers:

No. 1: Jab (straight punch)
No. 2: Hook
No. 3: Uppercut
No. 4: Body block (Basically you isolate your hip and move your torso side to side with hands on guard)

So when the session actually started, my "Promising" expectation suddenly vanished! Unlike the other fitness trainers this guy actually doesn't quite do the sets with us. Ah so now you know why he numbers his movements... lazy bugger! In all honesty I don't think this guy has any background in Muay Thai, Wing Chun, or even any other art of self defence. He actually pointed out that I threw my punch in the wrong technique! (Hallo! I actually trained with an ex Wing Chun teacher and boxer for 4 yrs?) Even his KICK seemed dance-like! So on and on he went, shouting out the various number combinations at different parts of the music, thinking that everyone (other than the regulars) are telepathic and can understand what he wanted us to do.

To make things worse, this trainer kept coming along my way to try to 'hit' me. On quite a few occasions, his disgusting hands brushed across my face (he was trying to test my block). But still! The thought of where his pair of hands have been before he stepped into the class, or even the thought of the amount of grime and bacteria on his hands have now been conveniently passed on to my face. Naturally i couldn't concentrate on what i had to do and fumbled with my steps, ending up looking like a complete idiot! He walked away laughing out loud, (probably feeling satisfied)! "Freaking Saddist!" i thought to myself.

My irritations aside, this guy actually gruelled us to the core! I think they shouldn't name this class "Boxercise" it should be better if they name it "commando-wannabe" class (something like that!). The boxing movements took up only 40%. The rest were filled with jumping jacks and a load of other movements which were hardly boxing-like.

And just when you think that it's time to COOL DOWN, he shouts, "Go get yourself a mat". We'll be doing sit-ups and push ups now. If you think it's the normal 'half crunch' think again. This probably some of the worst sit-up regime i've ever had! Everyone had to do the FULL crunch movement. I was taught that the FULL crunches were bad for the back and so i stuck to doing my half crunch. Lo and behold, the 'saddist' decides to walk over and asked what was i doing? So i said, "i'm sorry, but i'm just not used to doing the FULL crunch". Note his answer to me...

"Well, why do you want to stick to your comfort zone? You should succumb to me... and i will show you a whole new different dimension."

By now, everyone in the class was laughing at me. Okaaay... that was potential 'S&M' talk. (I've got a reason why I call it 'S&M'.) Fine! I 'succumbed' to my Master at that point. Needless to say, i've never felt more pathetic in executing my crunches than today! :( (I've been known by my mates to be rather fit.)

Imagine this:
- 30 Crunches (each set getting more challenging, commando-style) combined with 10 to 20 sets of push-ups. Utterly gruelling...

By now, everyone in the class was close to collapse-mode and i was silently crying out in my spirit, "OH GOD, HELP ME!" When the "Master" noticed this, to get us moving, he decided to resort to one of his 'weapons' - His BELT. I'm serious! He literally took his belt with a chain at the end and started screaming at everyone to move with the belt waved on his hand! (Go visualise)

Gosh! Today is definitely one of my most horrific experience at my gym. I am in shock! I seriously suffered adverse reactions to this whole ordeal... yes... first thing i got home was to pig out on my CNY leftover goodies (eating fatty food after my exercise is NOT my habit) in the dark!

I will mark this day. Today will be my first and my last time appearing in his class!

~ Lara ~